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Tuesday, May 12, 2009

How Dare You Fall Asleep During My Favorite Movie!

I have referred to my love of the movie "Jaws" more than once in this blog (Here and here for example). It is my favorite movie of all time, and it is awesome. And yet, not everyone thinks so...

Over the course of my life, I have introduced many people to Jaws. Sometimes I get to introduce someone I am dating to the glory that is "a giant shark eating people." Can you believe that more than once a girlfriend had the audacity to fall asleep while watching Jaws with me! How dare they!

I know what you're thinking. "Avish, that's ridiculous, no woman with any taste or sense would fall asleep watching such a magnificent piece of cinema. I hope you dumped her." I should have. I think in the hierarchy of justifiable reasons to break up with a women, the list looks something like:
  1. Pulling a Lorena Bobbit on you

  2. Shooting your wife in the face

  3. Falling asleep during your favorite movie (Unless your favorite movie was a sci-fi movie directed by Ridley Scott, kin which case if she doesn't fall asleep you should dump her because she probably has a sleep disorder).

  4. Cheating on you
Obviously, I'm being a bit facetious here (just a bit). But there is a lesson in here about wants vs. needs...

I have a friend who was going through a tough time years back, and saw a therapist. The therapist asked him to write out a list of what he was looking for in a woman. He created a giant list of "needs" that included, I kid you not, "must like Star Wars."

Now that was a must. i.e. a deal breaker. "Must like Star Wars." (and yes, all my friends are basically giant children)

The therapist got him to take a look at his list and reevaluate what he was making a need vs. a want. He pared down his list considerably to just this critical "must haves." "Must like Star Wars," wasn't on the new list.

As you may have guessed, he did find a great woman who in fact does love Star Wars. They are married now. But if she didn't love Star Wars he would be just as happy.

The Lesson: Sometimes we make our lives so hard by creating extensive lists of "must haves," when in fact, we would be ridiculously happy by satisfying a few fundamental needs. Wants are great, and you can have as many wants as you want (ha!), but take a long look at the goals dreams, and even day to day expectations you have in your life. Have you set too many unnecessary conditions on what has to happen for you to be happy?

Ironically, as with my buddy, by letting go of some of the things you think are "needs" you just may end up getting them anyhow.

Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go change my online dating profile's headline to, "Must Love Jaws"

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